Everybody wants to make their dreams happen. But if you’ve been dreaming of a yet-to-be-achieved adventure for a long time, you might be dragging around the ‘millstone of the unaccomplished’ – the nagging feeling that you’re in a failure zone on it. That’s a huge energy drain.
When that nice, juicy dream becomes an energy vampire, something has to be done about it. My mother would have said ‘It’s time to pee or get off the pot.’
Take a close look. Why do you want that dream? What you stand to gain from it? What are the compromises and costs of attaining it? Once you’ve really sussed that out, you’ll arrive at one of three conclusions:
- “Wow, I can do this thing and I’m going to start on it right now!” OR
- “Wow, this thing I’ve been dreaming about is actually not worth it to me considering the price I’ll have to pay in time, money, energy, etc.” OR
- “This dream is great but I can’t do it right now.”
We tend to think #1 is the only winning outcome, but all three are successes in their own ways. Sure, we’d love to be able to get ‘er done, but all these conclusions allow us to stop wasting energy, and that’s a good place to be. Lusting after dreams pointlessly makes a girl feel hopeless for not making them happen, when she could be redirecting all that energy and emotion to something positive.
If you land on answer #2, you’ll be dodging a bullet and allowing yourself to move on to something else that is just as exciting but much better for you and the life you live. Yay.
If you land on #3 —“Not right now”— you get to stop kicking yourself for not doing it. Put your dream, with all your beautiful understanding of what it will take, into a nice box and make a note to yourself to pull it out again in six months, a year, five years, whatever makes sense, to ask yourself, “Is it time yet?” until it is. In between those rare moments, ignore it. It’s not gone; it’s not dead; it’s just patiently waiting for you to be ready.
Then get on with something you can make happen now. Come up with a smaller, achievable-right-away adventure that will allow you to prove yourself you’ve got the gumption to make dreams happen – when they’re the right dreams, and the right time, for you.