What’s So Scary?

Why don’t we make our adventure-dreams happen? I don’t have the time. I don’t have the money. Great, logical reasons. But typically not the real one: I’m scared to death.

Don't let him get your toys.

Don’t let him get your toys.

Whether our longed-for adventure is a trip to Italy, sky diving, overhauling our personal look, or switching our career, we often lie to ourselves about why we can’t do it – so we don’t have to face down the boogeyman in our heads. Failure, rejection, ridicule, guilt; the boogeyman wears a lot of hats. Yes, a real lack of money or time might be the actual, bona-fide reason you aren’t doing your thing. But are you sure?

Try the Why exercise to get to where your boogeyman lives so you can bop him on the head. It goes something like this:

I can’t afford a trip to Italy. Why not? Because I have other financial commitments that are more important than my dream. Why? Because I promised each of my children a new laptop computer. Why? Because I feel the need to give them goodies. Why? Because I’m afraid if I don’t they’ll withdraw their love.

Of course, your children are not actually likely to withdraw their love because you chose to spend money on your well-deserved self instead of indulging their desire for updated equipment. They might even shock you by understanding. But it’s a surprisingly common prioritization of money for mothers.

Even if that made-up (but sadly real) example seems far-fetched to you, I can guarantee if you do this little exercise for yourself and keep at it, you’ll discover the real reasons for what’s stopping you. And if it’s a boogeyman, once you identify him you’re halfway to beating him.

How? Take a look at some of the other posts under ‘Tools’ and stay tuned for more boogeyman-busters.

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